ladydrace: (Default)
[personal profile] ladydrace
 Wow, okay, it's been so fucking long since I posted here, but I have some stuff I need to write out, so here goes.

I suddenly remembered today another reason why I fight so hard for Pea. Apart from the obvious, Pea loves his daddy.

Now, B and I fell apart, and there have been periods of animosity and bitterness and a lot of misunderstandings. And if I'm being brutally honest, I generally think B is pretty stupid.

But despite all of this I have never been able to find a single sign that he doesn't dearly love our kid. He adores Pea, and though I don't agree with his ways of handling the whole co-parenting deal, I am 100% sure that he will do anything for Pea if he has to. 

However, there have been incidents lately where Pea has been very sad about leaving mommy and generally having a hard time when we have to say goodbye. And today we went to a meeting at the daycare, and we went to say hi to him for five mins. At day's end, Pea was going to spend the weekend with daddy, and it's been almost 2 months since they saw each other last, and I was worried. I was worried that Pea would have lost focus on daddy, and would go immediately for me, only to be sad when told that he wouldn't be leaving with me.

But what I got was the perfect scenario. Pea made a bee-line for daddy, right into a hug, and joyfully told him that "guess what, Daddy!? I'm going home with YOU!" I got a little gooey inside, and so did B. Pea did come to me after, and one hug was obviously not enough, because it took a while to hug it out, but after that he was fine with the five mins we were there. He said goodbye without a fuss, and I could go home reassured that he would go to B's for the weekend without feeling cheated somehow.

I am gonna win this so Pea can have more time with his daddy. I want them to have their time, even if it means more bad habits to bring home. (leaving the toilet seat up for one). I want Pea to be able to talk to B. I look forward to B teaching Pea to shave or how to drive or whatever the time may bring. I want them to have that, so badly.

PS: wtf, Dreamwidth doesn't work in Chrome anymore? D:
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Lady Drace

April 2016

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