ladydrace: (Eye twitch)
Today is carnival day here in Aalborg. Imagine Mardi Gras with less beads and more city chaos, and it's dead on.

A trip to an otherwise scenic spot became a goddamn nightmare from all the changing of bus routes, and the incredibly scorching heat. So I was waiting at the bus station for a bus... any bus. I just wanted to get out of the masses of drunk people, and maybe find a slight breeze somewhere. Or a bathtub full of ice. Yes.

Anyway, as I was waiting, yet another couple of drunks came by. Or rather, came right up to me. I was generally ignoring the world with my earbuds playing my own music, rather than the thumping samba beats from everywhere. I thought maybe they wanted to ask for directions or something. It happens to me a lot. Then this odd conversation happened.

Guy: "Hey, wanna hear my nickname?"

Me: "Uh... sure, I guess..."

Guy: *grabbing his chubby gut* "Fatty!"

Me: "Oh, well... "

Guy: "But I love it!"

Me: "Uhm... have you had a few... *making swigging motions with hand*

Guy: "Oh, I've had a LOT!"

Me: "I see..."

Guy: "Look, I just saw you standing there, looking so cute, and since you've also got some extra pounds, I just wanted to come over here and tell you that you're lovely." (Transcribed from massive amounts of slurring and repeating.)

Then he touched my belly. (!!!)

Me: *vaguely creeped out now* "Oh... well... that's nice... thanks... uhm."

Guy: "You're so cute. Can I have a hug?"

Me: *blink* "Uhm..." *wants him to go away as smoothly as possible* "All right, but just very gently, okay?"

(Which to his credit he respected.)

Guy: "Bye!"

Me: "Have a nice party!" *smile*

I spent the next 20 mins or so unable to decide if I should be more flattered or disturbed by it.

Well at least there was a compliment in there somewhere...
ladydrace: (Painful Burning Sensation)
- No matter how well prepared you think you are, you're wrong.

- Time becomes a complete bitch and doesn't even bother to hide anymore how much it slows down or speeds up at the worst possible moments.

- There will be days consisting of nothing but poop, puke and pee with no redeeming features WHAT SO EVER!

- There will always be people who will see it as their duty to point out every single flaw in your parenting methods.

- You will cry. Oh yes. You will cry.
ladydrace: (Do they have a name for what's wrong wit)
Title: Bump My Fender. (I'm SO sorry, Elvis...)
Fandom: Supernatural / Blues Brothers crossover. (I don't even...)
Pairing: Impala/Bluesmobile. (Yeah. I went there.)
Rating: PG. (What, you were expecting car porn? TOUGH!)
Word count: 1312
Spoilers: Lets say season 6, just to be ultra safe.
Warnings: Crack. Seriously.
Feedback: Sure, why the hell not.
Disclaimer: I don't own any cars, real or fictional.
Beta:: I honestly can't think of anyone who deserved the horrible fate of betaing this...
Summary: Sentient cars meet. Yeah. Pretty much what it sounds like.
Notes: This is all [personal profile] tanamy s fault. You can all go ahead and blame her. I tried to chase her away with holy water and rock salt, but alas, no luck. She forced my hand! No, really!

Under the cut, because I would prefer to avoid nosebleeds from accidental exposure... )
ladydrace: (Hmmpf)
Finally got around to watching Merlin. No spoilers. But I'm torn. I'm not sure what I think of the way things are developing. But then again, I'm not opposed to keep watching either.

*shrug*
ladydrace: (Geek Kissing tip 4400 het.)
I need to make a fandom post. All worry and no play makes me a saaaaaaad puppy.

So without further ado, here's the completely spoiler-ridden overview of what I'm somehow managing to keep up with TV-wise.

Possible spoilers for House, Hawaii 5-0, Castle, NCIS, Criminal Minds, Flashpoint, Community, The Mentalist, Supernatural, Fringe and CSI Miami. *pant* )
ladydrace: (Vomit now?)
So. Having finally admitted that I'm a Supernatural fangirl and shipping Dean/Cas like the fucking navy, I did the only sensible thing and read some dirty NC-17 fanfic.

As it turns out, there is a problem with this, because apparently, someone in the fandom thought that it would be neato if angels could self-lubricate and promptly invented "oil glands". Angels- equipped for your gay pleasure. And it has caught on like goddamn wildfire!

I'm sorry, but this is the last straw. I've been polite about it before, but goddammit, I draw the line here!

PLEASE! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, PEOPLE! STOP IT WITH THE SELF-LUBING!

I get it. I really do. Because it's so easy and tempting.

Aliens? Well, naturally their physiology would be different from Humans and could easily include self-lubing peen. It could very well just be me, but unless the writer thinks up a damn good explanation as to why the self-lubing occurs, I'll reserve my right to see it as a shortcut to avoid writing realistic gay sex.

Magical lube-spell? (I'm looking at you, Harry Potter fandom!) I can kinda buy this one, because if I was a horny teenager with a magic wand, I would get really fucking creative really fast. But woah, I cannot help but imagine how many poor teens end up in the hospital from lust-addled, mispronounced spells. Especially the lube/stretch/inside/outside thing. Honestly, I get that you're horny, but couldn't you just conjure up a tub of lube and do the work yourself? Evidently not. Mortifying medical emergency, HERE I COME!

Angel-lube? I think I can sort of see where the idea might have come from. Without looking into it too closely, I seem to recall certain water fowl have some sort of oil glands, meant to waterproof their feathers during grooming. But from there to lube? Good GOD, people!

Note: This is very much my personal opinion and not meant as an affront to readers or writers of the above. I might not find it hot AT ALL, but if this is your kink, do feel free to enjoy it whenever possible. However, if you only write self-lubing because you don't know about gay sex, then for god's sake, just admit you've never bought lube and consequently have no idea how it works. Watch some gay porn (there's plenty online) and get back to writing realistic sex. Thank you. If you believe that self-lubing is somehow less messy or less complicated than regular sex, then I personally think you're missing the point.

ladydrace: (Young Ones Vyv extreme violence)
No Pea journal the rest of this week. No brain power left over.

TGIF has a whole extra meaning here, since it's the day Pea's caretaker doesn't come in. I love Fridays. Also, Pea will be going home with grandma tomorrow as well. It's nearly a routine and considering the freakiness of this week I cling to routines like a drowning man to a life buoy right now.

So tomorrow I will sleep. Sleeeeeeeeeeeep.

Fannish update: It seems like everything I've ever watched is starting again at the same time. I've watched Hawaii 5-0, Castle, Flashpoint, NCIS and Criminal Minds. Looking forward to The Mentalist, Community, Supernatural, Fringe and most of all CSI Miami! EVIL CLIFFHANGERS SHOULD BE AGAINST THE LAW!!

Not sure if I'll be adding House to the watch list. Time will tell.

In other news, today I discovered the band Oingo Boingo. The name alone is surreal and although I find many of the songs really weird, I can't stop humming them. Plus, the fact that Danny Elfman was the lead singer was complete news to me and I spent a long time on youtube just watching the man sing. I knew he could, (Skeleton Jack's Lament, anyone?) but seeing it? That was new. He had some very interesting dance styles... and all the while I had the hardest time shaking the feeling that I was looking at Vyvyan from The Young Ones. :oS Honestly, my brain...

*goes off humming Weird Science*
ladydrace: (Doktor Svans)
For many (and currently unimportant) reasons, I found myself reading about asexuality on Tumblr yesterday. And OMG, I found it pretty damn scary.

Now, I understand that Tumblr is a good place to vent your frustrations over the complete lack of understanding you meet as an asexual (or otherwise difficult to label) person. But frankly I was startled by the lack of understanding in their own camp. So your family doesn't understand the concept of asexuality. That's upsetting. I get that. But did anyone stop to think that maybe we poor hetero people find the concept as difficult to grasp as you do the idea of actually wanting to have sex?

Telling your folks that you're asexual doesn't mean that they magically understand what that even is. Give it time.

Also, if you're in your teens, I wish you'd give it just a little more time before deciding that just because you have not yet felt any interest in sex in the 5 or so years since your body was even ready for that sort of thing, that it will be impossible to feel any such desire in the next 80 years too. That your poor parents would even suggest such a thing does not sex-nazis make.

Jesus.

TL;DR: I guess there's wank in ANY community.

Tranny icon very appropriate.
ladydrace: (HAHAHA!)
I had fun with Cleverbot today :oP





And there you have it. Straight from the horse's mouth. Or the internet's. Whichever you prefer. Either way, I am a very happy fangirl. :oP

ladydrace: (O.O Vinnie)
Damn you, Paul Gross. Damn you fifty times over....





Hubba hubba...!

ladydrace: (Chakotay silly Voyager)
For some strange reason, yesterday I suddenly decided that my real name is way too boring if I ever write a book. So I came up with a (frankly quite silly) alias for if I ever finish any of my original fiction. Nerd alert. For real.

On the fannish front I can report that I'm watching Numb3rs, Farscape, White Collar, Primeval and Sanctuary.

Numb3rs: I'm in the middle of season 2 and for some strange reason, I ship the Epps brothers. Why, brain, WHY?! Of all the incest ships.... Apart from weird ship of the year, I'm enjoying the supporting characters more than I think I've done in any other series, ever.

Farscape: This is one of the rare examples of a sci-fi series that drops in quality in later seasons. Okay, so the props and effects are better, but the plots keep disappointing me, where they impressed me a lot more in early seasons. I'm almost done with the series and I'm hoping the movies will prove to be higher quality. It's still entertaining, though. Gotta give it that.

White Collar: Just watched the season opener and I'm happy to announce that my stupid grin is firmly in place. No spoilers, other than I like how they handled the fall-out from season 2.

Primeval: Still mainly watching it for Alexander Siddig and I'm so far disappointed with his lack of screen time. Also, my hatred of Abby increases exponentially with every episode. *unintelligable noises of disgust*

Sanctuary: I'm not all that impressed with the latest episodes. I need more Tesla. A lot more. And more Henry. *nods*

On the real life front, I will be having Pea with me for the next 3 weeks. *gulp* Wish me luck!
ladydrace: (Snookums? Kurt.)
I've bought an exercise machine. I feel like it's a major fail. Maybe because I've seen so many people go all "I'm gonna get fit now!" and buy these things, only to have them gathering dust behind the stacks of take-out containers. But I guess I really shouldn't be so hard on myself. At least I'm prepared to try. And if nothing else, it might help me get my ass in gear from the guilt trip I will no doubt give myself if I never use it.

Anyways, it was cheap and I've bought several other stupid things before, so...

Wish me luck!
ladydrace: (Geek Kissing tip 4400 het.)
Well...

TV I'm watching:

Kinda spoilers under here for NCIS and Criminal Minds )

To round things off, some interest was shown in my Ceramic Badger. So here he is!

Look at 'iiimmmmmmmm! Isn't he cute!


He has this wonderful smooth back. I pet him a lot.      ...What? He's cute!!!

ladydrace: (Default)
I'm doomed.

You may or may not know... I am a bit (okay, a LOT) of a Jane Austen fan. I was moronic enough to watch the latest BBC miniseries remake of Emma. And now...

I WANNA WRITE GARAK/BASHIR AUSTEN AU!!!

I'm doomed. I mean, damn... who would even want to read that??
ladydrace: (Default)
I just read an article about 10 signs of ageing. Apparently it's from The Daily Mail, but I cannot seem to find a link for it. (the Danish version can be found here, if anyone cares.

Anyway, all 10 signs are things I've been doing all my life... not sure if I should laugh or cry.

Laugh. Definitely. Wearing flat shoes does not determine age. Nor does a preference for quiet holidays or big knickers. *giggle*

Oh dear. Must be slow times for the news if those are the headlines we are to expect.

ladydrace: (OMGWFT)
Went to the doctor yesterday. Got rid of my most recent meds. Finally, no more paranoia!

However, to my surprise, he had another type ready for me to try. It sounded good, so I accepted. He did warn me that they were known for making people sleep the day away, but I was like: "Meh. Other meds have claimed the same with no effect. Phooey." So I went home, and since I hadn't taken my pills that morning I took the new combination before starting dinner.

Let's just say, I never made dinner. Or breakfast. I was hit in the head with a hammer and fell asleep before 6pm and didn't wake up properly until 10am. And I'm still feeling somewhat fuzzed over.

BUT, BUT, BUT! These are the first pills I've ever taken, who keeps their promises so well (and so promptly)!

My head. Is. Quiet. When I turn off all sound, I can sit and enjoy the peace for the first time in years, without starting to panic over the chaos in my brain. It's a bloody miracle, that's what it is! Side effects are kind of heavy, but if I can manage to wake up properly, once I get a routine going, this medicine will be a true and utter miracle. This could save my life. Oh my god. I hardly know what to do first!?

ladydrace: (Me)
So, I was around the web on a lot of "love yourself" sites today and watched (and read) a few fat rants, which inspired my own. It's very much about me, so if you can't be bothered to watch it, trust me, I won't get hurt. ;o)





ladydrace: (Vomit now?)
Having a steady stream of Voyager distracting me through the last few days of nausea means that I've reached the end of the series sooner than I expected. And without offering any spoilers I can honestly say that the finale was one of the most bullshitty of any series I've ever watched from start to finish. At least in my personal and very biased opinion.

Hell, suddenly even that last disappointing episode of JAG doesn't seem so bad...

For the rest of Voyager, though, I'm more positive. I was warned by several people not to expect too much, but generally, I've been "adequately entertained". And considering some of the crap that's on TV in these over-televised times, I'm happy with that.

DS9 is still my favorite trek. TNG is still my ideal future. TOS is still cracktastic and until someone gives me an EXTREMELY good reason to risk it again, I'll stay the hell away from ENT. Reboot? What reboot? /denial.

In other short news, I updated my website today. Go me. I actually got something done.

And now I think I'll go back to bed and try for the third night in a row to get some real sleep. 2 hours every morning isn't quite enough. :oS But sadly, I've found no cure for the persistant nausea keeping me up. But at least I'm not puking. It's not all bad.
ladydrace: (Mind in the gutter)
Well, after 2 days of turning myself inside out and desperately making arrangements for Pea while I was down for the count, I finally manage some sleep. And what do I dream of? Go on, guess! I bet you can't... I sure never could have.

Voyager.

And sex.

With Harry Kim.

I mean wtf?

There were also some other really interesting parts, including the before-mentioned ensign wearing a pink tutu. (And I also caught him in some golden sandals, but he kept denying it.) Not during the sex, at least. Thank god.

If I needed any more proof that I'm seriously ill, this would do nicely.

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Lady Drace

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