I can't speak on the other stuff, but I feel I can reassure you on Pea: he'll be fine. Children are far more resilient than adults give them credit for.
I had to deal with separated houses from one of the worst ages possible, ~8 - young enough that I didn't completely understand how to deal, yet old enough to miss being in one house with my parents, however violent a household it was. They moved further and further apart, and now live almost 900 miles (over 1400 km) apart. Pea, at least, has the advantage that he's incredibly young - as he grows up, it'll be a fact of life that his parent don't live together, and that means he won't have to go through the process of adapting after years and years of living otherwise.
Also - my parents were emotionally neglectful, borderline abusive, at times. But the genuine love they showed for me more than made up for it. From how you've described your husband so far, I don't think he will regularly take out his frustrations on Pea. But even if he does, know this - if his love for Pea is real, then Pea will be fine, regardless of what happens.
Dads, even ones that don't really know what to do with kids, are usually pretty good at figuring things out. And not all of them are as opposed to calling (ex)wives/girlfriends for help when it comes down to their own children as TV would have us believe. My mother had my father arrested, tried in court, and left my dad half in debt from all the reparations ensuing, and at that time, my parents didn't hate anyone else more than they hated each other. But when I got sick while staying with my father, the first person he called was still my mother. Whatever else parents may feel, a lot of that gets chucked right out the window when their kids are involved. And so far, your divorce isn't anywhere near as bad as my parents' was.
At this point, your best bet is that when you hand off Pea to B, just make sure to leave him with as many venues of communication open as possible.
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I had to deal with separated houses from one of the worst ages possible, ~8 - young enough that I didn't completely understand how to deal, yet old enough to miss being in one house with my parents, however violent a household it was. They moved further and further apart, and now live almost 900 miles (over 1400 km) apart. Pea, at least, has the advantage that he's incredibly young - as he grows up, it'll be a fact of life that his parent don't live together, and that means he won't have to go through the process of adapting after years and years of living otherwise.
Also - my parents were emotionally neglectful, borderline abusive, at times. But the genuine love they showed for me more than made up for it. From how you've described your husband so far, I don't think he will regularly take out his frustrations on Pea. But even if he does, know this - if his love for Pea is real, then Pea will be fine, regardless of what happens.
Dads, even ones that don't really know what to do with kids, are usually pretty good at figuring things out. And not all of them are as opposed to calling (ex)wives/girlfriends for help when it comes down to their own children as TV would have us believe. My mother had my father arrested, tried in court, and left my dad half in debt from all the reparations ensuing, and at that time, my parents didn't hate anyone else more than they hated each other. But when I got sick while staying with my father, the first person he called was still my mother. Whatever else parents may feel, a lot of that gets chucked right out the window when their kids are involved. And so far, your divorce isn't anywhere near as bad as my parents' was.
At this point, your best bet is that when you hand off Pea to B, just make sure to leave him with as many venues of communication open as possible.