Pea and daycare and stuff.

I'll probably be posting about Pea and daycare a whole fucking lot in the coming weeks. So... just so you know.

First a little yay... I finally figured out that unprenouncable name: Abdirhaman. I feel accomplished. *nods* Now to learn the names of the other 50 kids. *sigh*

Pea is still doing great. I left the room today for a few mins and he hardly seemed to notice. We've agreed with his caretaker that we'll try leaving him with her for half an hour or so on Tuesday. I'm sure it'll be fine. Or, more correctly, I'm sure he will be fine. Up until now I've felt no real discomfort about the idea of leaving him with other people for the day. I trust them and I know he'll be fine once he gets used to it. There will probably be some crying and worry at first, but I'm not uncomfortable with the idea.

However, a whole new thought struck me today. My baby is going to change. I will no longer be there all the time. I might miss some things. Like his first step or his first word. And he will come home every day full of impressions that are going to shape him in whole new ways. Before long, he will no longer be the baby I know. Before long, he will be a child with his own little world of everyday routines and friends.

And I won't be there.

This saddens me a lot more than I ever expected it would. Which means I can't stop hugging and kissing my sweet little boy today. *sigh*

Other than that, I was very close to having a panic attack at daycare, but I managed to avoid it by breathing deeply and telling myself over and over again that I was being silly. Go me! I can still feel that little tickle of panic under the surface, but I think it's calm enough for now. *phew*

I still worry about how to handle the next week or so, though. *shiver* Well, at least hubby will be there Wednesday when I got to therapy. Maybe I can even persuade him to take the whole day at daycare on Monday, so I can have a breather. God, I hope so. Especially because hubby has got plans for the weekend. So it seems only fair that he gets to relax with his buddies this weekend and I get to fall to pieces on Monday. *nods*

Fanfic quote of the day

"Uncle, I did see him first," she said, in a clipped, mock-wounded voice.

From Oath and Stipulation by idanianspice  and rhr_noir .

(And please do continue this... please?)