Fanfic quote of the day

3. Jadzia thinks a good time with Ferengi involves drinking and gambling. Garak thinks a good time with a Ferengi is practising how to kill them.

From Top Ten Reasons Why Julian Now Prefers Garak Over Jadzia by Elizabeth Helena.

Doctor visits and such.

So, today I was whiny and convinced hubby to take a day off to help with Pea, went to the doctor and was a truly manipulative bitch when I came home. Yeah.

I hardly had any sleep last night due to some very sudden stomach issues. So when Pea woke up at 5AM I felt like a wrung out rag and whined at hubby until he agreed to stay home. He took care of Pea most of the morning and then took him to daycare, so I could have a little nap before going to the doc. I knew I would need my wits about me for that.

So I went. A lot of questions were asked and answered and in the end we came to a new compromise. First of all, my dosage on my daily meds is upped again while my new benzos will be lower and she says I don't need to worry about taking too many yet. According to her, I'm still a long way off over-use, but since they make me so sleepy, she suggested we tried some milder ones.

My suicide issues were more worrisome and she referred me to The Centre for Prevention of Suicide. They should get in touch with me within the next week, but she was very serious about me calling her if anything happened before that. If I got worried at all, she told me to contact her. She's so sweet. The Centre should hopefully have a few ideas on what might help. At least with my most immediate problems. My doc says that she'll help with finding treatment for me somehow and we'll talk again in a month or so, to evaluate the effect of my new meds and find out what else I might need.

When I got home I fell into bed and slept the day away. Literally. I woke up about half an hour before I had to go and pick up Pea from daycare. Hubby hadn't really moved from the computer all day and he was kinda cranky. So I went and got Pea, went to the shop and came home with a very sleepy son, who was incredibly whiny for a few hours. Hubby was still at his computer. He did manage a few chores I asked him to do, but absolutely nothing else. Normally, this doesn't bother me, but since I specifically asked him to stay home to take the load off me, some kind of effort would have been nice.

So because I was tired and drained from the emotional importance of the doctor's appointment and a whiny baby, I resorted to the mean pleasure of guilt tripping hubby. I apologized profoundly for the fact that my illness ruins our lives and for about a second I enjoyed his misery. Then I hated myself for it. I strongly suspect he went off for his play tonight fairly down.

I feel like such a bitch. :o(