Ah, alien sex!

[ladydrace]

After spending a lot of time browsing rant forums and badfic comms, I feel the need to pull out some of the positive things of a human/alien pairing. So here are 10 amusing things I've come across in G/B fics which I thought was beautifully original and funny without being strange. No linking this time unless you really want to know where I got something. This is strictly from memory, so probably not quoted right either.


1.
Julian: "I'm coming!"
Garak: "Coming where?"

2.
Garak: "Julian... what exactly am I holding?"

3.
Garak: "I haven't... well... broken anything, have I?"

4.
Julian: "Where is it?"

5.
Julian: "Did you... I mean... did it...uhm... are you finished?"

6.
Garak: "Maybe I should have left the lights on..."

7.
Julian: "What did you put in me?!"
Garak: "Nothing you didn't ask for."
Julian: "... I'm SURE that's not what's in me now!"

8.
Julian: "Was it... ok?"
Garak: "You couldn't tell?"

9.
Garak: "Is it... supposed to do that?"

10.
Julian: "And that's.... pleasurable?"
Garak: "People have been known to have heart attacks..."

Comments

[birggitt.livejournal.com]

*laughs madly* Some of these I've read, other were completely new. But any of them is just ROTFLMAO!!!
What a fantastic way to begin an otherwise, really grey Wednesday =D

[lady-drace.livejournal.com]

Cheered me up just thinking about these. :oP

[mrs-picard.livejournal.com]

ROFLMAO!!!! I love these! I've never written graphic slash between a human and an alien... for precisely these reasons! I mean I already know only theoretical stuff about human/human sex, so how the hell am I supposed to know anything about human/alien? *giggle* It would only sound awkward, I'm afraid. @.@ *lol*

[lady-drace.livejournal.com]

Probably a good idea not to go graphic, then. :oP

[mrs-picard.livejournal.com]

Yeah if I ever decide to finally write Picard/Sarek or Picard/Spock, I'll totally keep things somewhat vague. LOL. No need to keep them vague for Picard/Riker or something, though. *grin*

[lady-drace.livejournal.com]

Mmmm.... Ponn Farr...

[mrs-picard.livejournal.com]

LOL yes it is soooo tempting to write Spock + Pon Farr + Jean-Luc... mhmmm, yes. :D

[lady-drace.livejournal.com]

<------

[mrs-picard.livejournal.com]

LMAO! What a line! I can see him saying this to Jean-Luc.

Okay, not really, but hey, the look on Jean-Luc's face would be priceless!

[lady-drace.livejournal.com]

Somehow when I see that icon, I immediately picture some convention kid with very fake vulcan ears doing the handsign and trying to pick up the "7 of 9" chicks with lines like this. :oP

[mrs-picard.livejournal.com]

And failing, of course! *lol*

[morganscorpian.livejournal.com]

Just re-reading the Cardassian Sutra.....

I must Google no 2.

[lady-drace.livejournal.com]

In case you didn't find it, I remembered which one it was from.
http://www.trekiverse.org/archive/2000/adult/ds9/SinsOfEmission

Sins of Emission

[morganscorpian.livejournal.com]

That is just beautiful!

So glad you posted that link.

Re: Sins of Emission

[lady-drace.livejournal.com]

Oh yes, it's one of the best G/B fics ever!

[bibsy-bebs.livejournal.com]

Julian: "I'm coming!"
Garak: "Coming where?"

<3 That is the most adorable thing I have EVER read.

[lady-drace.livejournal.com]

Isn't it just? :oP

[cyranothe2nd.livejournal.com]

Garak's strong fingers slid in an obedient caress.
'Oh my God!'
His erection was abruptly freed. The Cardassian said, alarmed
'I do hope that wasn't some kind of heretical act -'


ROFL!

[lady-drace.livejournal.com]

Oh yeah. It's the perfect reaction!

I mean come on! Your lover is from thousands of lightyears away from earth, and you expect sex to be a walk in the park? I think not... there HAS to be moments where you go: "Is it 'supposed' to do that?"