Fanfic quote of the day

As Miles watched the doctor leave, he wondered how he had managed to open his mouth just wide enough to have his foot inserted quite comfortably. O'Brien shook his head as he started off in the direction of his quarters. A pregnant male Cardassian tailor with a husband who was thinking of ways to breastfeed? Every time Miles thought he had seen everything, something came along to catch him off guard.

From Blessed Events by Diana Bloomfield.

(Poor Miles...)

*le sigh*

Still no contractions. So in about 1½ hour we go back to the hospital to get it started. I really hope we're allowed to stay this time. If the contractions are really slow to start up, they might send us back home for the night, but I really, really hope not. I want to have this baby now, dammit!!

In laws are here and cleaning. I'm living through it. The trip to my mom had to be forgotten, since my water broke. I'm leaking at every step I take, so home was the better choice, despite the stress. I'm alive so far, so I think we'll manage.

The good thing about this is that I'm not at all worried about the hospital anymore. Now I'm looking forward to it like a holiday. Give me the pain, screaming, blood and goo, please. Anything but the in laws. Eeeek!

Anyway, wish me luck! Will update on twitter until we leave.

Hell on toast...

...as the glorious Eddie Izzard once said. This day has been a disaster from beginning to end. I should have told the bloody inlaws to stay the fuck away as soon as the water broke.

But I thought "Sure, I can deal with this. I'll probably be too busy with giving birth to care one bit about anything else."

WRONG!!!!

I spent a long long long day simply waiting and listening to the sounds of cellphones on earsplitting volumes, shouting (since that seems to be the inlaws' favorite form of communication), vacuuming, flushing, scrubbing and rinsing. My safety zone was completely demolished with smells of very foreign cleaning agents (that still cling to everything btw and is making me jittery) and forced niceties.

I tried... I swear, I really tried to endure! I tried to be nice and friendly towards the people who were generously trying to do me a favour. And I succeeded... up to a certain point.

4 PM arrived and mum in law gave us a lift to the hospital (in an extremely stressful manner, I might add, but that's a whole other story for another time) and in we went, feeling that FINALLY something would get started.

But alas, the ward was stuffed to breaking point, so we sat for even more time, simply waiting. In the empty waiting room, only occasionally visited by some family member or other I started to crack. Got very nervous and only managed to control it because hubby was there. When we finally got the exam started, I broke down. I cried my eyes out in the hospital bed and had a minor panic attack over the whole day. The midwife was extremely nice and not at all put off by my weeping. She just let it take its course and did what she had to do.

We had hoped to be allowed to stay there, but ultimately we were sent home after having a pill inserted, and were told to call if anything al all happened, but otherwise just come back in the morning.

But the homecoming... that's where it REALLY got interesting. Much to my shock, inlaws were still there and still cleaning. And the first thing that happened was that I started bleeding and of course that set off inlaws in a tirade of how the hospital would HAVE to take us in now, and I desperately tried to explain to them that they wouldn't unless it was something serious or the contractions had started. It turned ugly and I shouted at mum in law, before I smacked the bedroom door in her face to call the hospital like I was told. The kind midwife on the phone confirmed what I had been told earlier and advised me to get a good night's sleep. Emerging from the bedroom, I sourly proclaimed my victory ("told ya!") and promtly lapsed into the worst anxiety attack I've had since before I got pregnant.

I don't know why, but I can easily deal with people seeing me being violently ill, puking my guts out or having the runs of the century. No problem. But having people see me shaking, crying and drawing nail marks in my desk from primal fear is just so embarrassing to me somehow. But at least now they know I wasn't bloody kidding about having serious issues with their cleaning.

They are finally gone now and I'm slowly regaining control of myself. My hands are still shaking and I'm just so tired. Inlaws were kind and relatively understanding, but damn... this has now officially been labelled the worst timing EVER in the whole course of my life.

(Oh, and hubby's phone just beeped and made me flinch. This is really not good.)

I guess now there's nothing left to do but try and sleep a little and hope contractions start soon. Thanks for all the well wishing and prayers. We'll hopefully need them soon.